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39-year-old millionaire who rents: Why I'm ‘so much happier' not being a homeowner

Photo: Bernadette Joy

Growing up in New York as the eighth of nine kids, my immigrant parents had big homeowner dreams for me.

So in 2013, at 28, my husband and I bought our first home: a two-bedroom, 1,496-square-foot house in Charlotte, North Carolina for $101,000. We had a 10-year mortgage.

Having a real estate portfolio became a huge part of my financial identity. I thought it meant I was finally an adult. Over the course of a decade, we bought and sold three properties: our first home, a four-bedroom house, and a two-bedroom condo. I also paid off $300,000 of debt and made my first million. 

By 2019, I was a proud homeowner with a paid-off mortgage. During the pandemic, however, my goals changed, and I wanted more flexibility. So in 2022, we sold our property and started renting again.

Here's why I'm so much happier now and don't regret leaving homeownership behind.

I feel like my space is more manageable

Today, we rent a 1200-square-foot, two-bedroom apartment in Charlotte for $2,553 a month.

We used to spend $3,400 on our monthly housing expenses when we lived in our four-bedroom, including $750 every month for maintenance and DIY projects. We also kept $20,000 in an emergency fund for unexpected issues, like when our washing machine flooded our laundry room.

Now we outsource maintenance headaches to our property manager. Our emergency fund covers closer to five months instead of three, and we sleep better at night.

Since downsizing, I've cut the time I spend on chores in half. And we love living with less clutter after discarding and donating many pieces of clothing and furniture.

I have access to the amenities I want

Living in the suburbs during the pandemic, I felt a little isolated. It made me realize how much I wanted a walkable environment.

At my rental, I can easily stroll to restaurants and parks, and I'm a five-minute drive to theaters, museums and galleries. Our building has a rooftop, co-working space and gym, and holds many community events. 

Before landing on our apartment, we put in a cash offer in a highly competitive market for a two-bedroom, two-bathroom condo — without any of the amenities we wanted. We still didn't get it. 

Had we moved into that condo, we would've been spending about $1800 more a month just to have access to the same kind of services. I'm glad we didn't settle for something we didn't like as much, just to say we're homeowners.

I can invest more in myself and my future

With our money no longer tied up in real estate, we invested the proceeds of the property sales in more flexible options, like high-yield savings accounts and CDs. The passive income we're getting from those investments now is enough to cover roughly $2,500 worth of monthly expenses.

We've been able to focus more on saving for retirement, too. Even maxing out our 401(k), IRA and FSA accounts, we still have money left over for other expenses, like traveling.

I'm an entrepreneur and financial educator. Thanks to our new living situation, I can invest more into growing my business and skills, set aside funds for conferences and networking events, and cover fun self-care activities like yoga, stand-up comedy, dance, and acting classes.

I wouldn't change a thing

I want to be clear that I don't think it is a poor decision to own a home, and it isn't financial folly to rent, if that's what you feel is right. The flexibility of renting has given us the confidence to explore moving abroad, and maybe even own a home again in the future.

Many people still ask me why I'm renting when I can afford to buy a place, but I've learned to stop justifying it to others with different values. So the last time I was asked, I simply responded: "I'm happy where I am." 

Bernadette Joy is the CEO of Crush Your Money Goals and a first-gen Filipina-American money coach. She has helped thousands ditch debt, master their savings, start investing and find financial peace. Bernadette paid off $300,000 of debt in three years, and became a millionaire in her 30s. Follow her on Instagram and YouTube.

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