Longstanding Curbed obsession 184 Kent Avenue—the old Austin Nichols warehouse on the Williamsburg waterfront that was emptied of hipsters, controversially unlandmarked, spared from various zany plans and later hollowed-out—just took a big step forward. The renovated and restored design was supposed to be ready for renters by summer '09, but alas, that's not the case. Instead, it's looking like fall, or so the brand spankin' new 184 Kent website (rentonkent.com!) tells us. The building will have 1-3 bedroom lofts, a doorman and concierge, roof deck, open-air lounges and a gym. A blockbuster like this doesn't need much to build buzz, but that didn't stop the 184 Kent team from trying, rather unfortunately.
Tied into the 184 Kent awareness campaign is a mock Williamsburg dating site called Williamsburg Love. On it is the story of Wenda & Branston, a satirical video that touches upon Williamsburg stereotypes both old (PBR!) and new (my parents cut me off!). While we're not ready to string anyone up over a somewhat bland attempt at hipster humor, Burg culture gatekeepers FREEwilliamsburg are not feeling as forgiving:
Apparently the message of this video is that if you're a pasty, dullard from Wisconsin who sometimes gets mistaken for Jared the Subway dude, fear not. Buy a luxury condo on the Williamsburg waterfront and you'll be fucking braindead hipster hotties in no time. And like the poster behind Jared's brother, "Branston," informs us, you don't even have to be Jewish.
"Love is all about location," Branston tells us, forgetting that other age-old adage: effective advertising is all about not being a fucking imbecile.
Can renters be braindead hipster hotties, too? We'll soon find out!