PLAID TO THE BONE: Sean Connery hosts a Scottish fashion show where the likes of Brendan Fraser and Gossip Girl's Ed Westwick parade around in kilts, as everyone gets fitshaced on comped Glenfiddich - and the proceeds go to charity. No, it's not some dream you had after a pizza binge. It's Dressed to Kilt, A Scottish Evening of Fashion and Fun at M2, 7:30 p.m.
THE EYEBROWS HAVE IT: Jules Dassin's Reunion in France (1942) has Joan Crawford emoting throughout the City of Light, trying to keep John Wayne hidden from the Nazis. Film Forum, 7:30 p.m.
HOLD PLEASE: To celebrate a year of broadcasting, 101.9 RXP packs a lineup of rock/folky/indie artists into the Fillmore at Irving Plaza for Paper Rock Steady, anchored by the thinking-man's party band, Brooklyn's own The Hold Steady. 8 p.m.