Oliver Perez Takes the Fun Out of Everything

Seven walks help end nine-game home winning streak

It's been a pretty enjoyable little run at Citi Field over the last few weeks. The Mets played with an abundance of energy through winds that turned the field into a ballet of garbage, a situation that makes you wonder whether the stadium would turn into a Queens version of Fresh Kills if the Mets could find a way to fill the place.

It has felt like they are on their way to doing that at different points during their nine-game home winning streak, especially on Friday and Saturday when they won games with walk-off homers from each of their catchers. Yes, they blew leads to force those situations in both games but who can remember that when the ball is falling over the fence and the shaving cream pies are being shoved in faces? It's a win, it's exciting and it's just so damn fun! 

Oliver Perez hates fun. He's the guy who points out the dismal state of slaughterhouses when you're enjoying a juicy ribeye, he's the guy who responds to news of your engagement by asking if you're worried about your fiance getting mugged on the subway for her ring and he's the guy who follows two thrilling wins by walking seven hitters in three-and-a-third innings of excruciating pitching. 

What a thrill that must have been for all the families that decided to celebrate Mother's Day at the ballpark. It was cold, it was windy and they were treated to a major leaguer doing his latest and best impersonation of a nine-year-old pitching for the very first time. Perhaps that tugs at the heartstrings of a mom remembering when members her own brood was just finding its way, but it doesn't do much for anyone who wants to feel good about the Mets. 

Outside of Perez, there's been a lot of reason to feel good. Rod Barajas didn't get the memo that Citi Field makes it impossible to hit homers, Mike Pelfrey and Jonathan Niese are providing best case scenarios and the team is three games over .500. David Wright has found his power again, at least when he isn't striking out, and Ike Davis has been a gigantic jolt of good vibes. It's hard to imagine anyone, outside of Keith Hernandez, finding all of this boring. 

Most obvious question and answer of the day: How does he get away with that? He's Keith Hernandez. 

Anyway, Perez hovers over all of this good feeling like a dark cloud because his every start is a reminder that the Mets have hideous flaws that are going to keep them from really making a run at this thing if they aren't dealt with really, really soon. It's hard to enjoy the dance, after all, if you know that the second you leave you're going to get kicked in the groin.  

Josh Alper is a writer living in New York City and is a contributor to FanHouse.com and ProFootballTalk.com in addition to his duties for NBCNewYork.com. You can follow him on Twitter.

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