Welcome to Watch List, where we identify five things on TV to watch while you stay at home redirect a government-funded space laser into Professor Hathaway's house, filling it to the top level with delicious buttered popcorn. LET’S GO!

THE GORILLA WHISPERER – 8:00PM (Animal Planet) World Wildlife Fund researcher Angelique Todd spends some time hanging out with silverback gorillas in Central Africa. The secret to good gorilla whispering, of course, is to promise them lots and lots of bananas. But don't offer them tickets to the new "Planet of the Apes" movie. I'm told the silverbacks found the movie extremely ape-ist. ANTICIPATION: MONKEYS!

KATIE: MY BEAUTIFUL FRIENDS – 10:00PM (OWN) Former UK model Katie Piper was terribly disfigured three years ago in an acid attack perpetrated by her ex-boyfriend and an accomplice, and now she has her own show on Oprah's network, going around and mentoring people facing similar physical challenges. Piper's two assailants now sit in jail, and really, don't they deserve MORE than jail? I mean... an acid attack? Really? Don't you deserve to be fed to sharks for that? I feel like that's the just thing to do. ANTICIPATION: POIGNANT!

REAL SPORTS WITH BRYANT GUMBEL – 10:00PM (HBO) New York Jets wideout Plaxico Burress sits down for his first interview since being released from prison on a gun charge that nearly ruined his career. Plaxico learned his lesson from the ordeal, and that lesson would be "Do not bring a gun to a nightclub and then accidentally shoot yourself with that gun." ANTICIPATION: PLAXY!

CHOPPED – 10:00PM (Food Network) If I see one more contestant make a gastrique, there's no telling what I'll do. ANTICIPATION: KNOCK IT OFF!

BILLY THE EXTERMINATOR – 10:00PM (A&E) Billy's gotta take out some geese. When I was a kid, we had geese outside our house sometimes, and it was my job to run out into the yard scaring the geese off. It's a great job for a kid, because you get to spazz out like an idiot and the geese run away in fear. I wish this trick worked at the DMV, but personal experience has proven this is not the case. ANTICIPATION: HONK HONK!

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