Chelsea: Thugs are overturning Vespas here! In Kensington, Brooklyn, they're slashing tires! Up in Inwood, they're muggin', gang bangin' and wielding bats! Scared, barely audible voice: What...the hell...is happening...in our city?!? [Curbed]
Clinton Hill: People queued up at Brown Memorial Church this weekend to turn in their guns for $200 a pop (oops!), part of a city program to get guns off the streets. Five Brooklyn churches collected 687 guns. That's pretty cool. Send 'em back to Appalachia! [WNYC via Clinton Hill Blog]
East Village: You know that whole messy traffic area around the "Cube" sculpture in Astor Place where you always feel like you'll die crossing from the big Starbucks to St. Marks? Well, it's supposed to get redesigned to lower your risk of pedestrian death, though exactly how we can't figure out from this complicated description. [Villager]
Fordham: We're all for programs like this that help hard-working immigrant street vendors like Berta here in the Bronx get permits to sell yummy, cheap food (especially tacos!). But, on an entirely unrelated note, local papers like these have to learn to write shorter articles. [Norwood News]
Fort Greene: Despite that faith-baiting meeting last Thursday to try to air things out, shoppers and vendors at the newish Brooklyn Flea clashed with nearby churchgoers this Sunday over parking, noise, and trash. But at least one parishioner hit the Flea after for a taco! [NYDN via Gothamist]
Greenpoint: You know why people feel justified in parking their cars in the new bike lanes here and elsewhere in the city? (And believe us, they do.) Because "Cars pay taxes and fees. And bikes don't." Oh, okay, we guess it's okay, then. Not! [Gowanus Lounge]
Jackson Heights: You've watched the scruffles of Williamsburg play in their temporarily car-free street, now watch the cute kids of JaxHeights do the same. Isn't JaxHeights so like the real-life Sesame Street of New York, like, so diverse and stuff? [Streetsblog]
Soho: Lindsay Lohan is shopping in Chanel on Spring Street, our spies tell us. Right now!