Introduction
Join a Support Group
Write, Write, Write
Look for Hope
Spirituality and Faith
Learn Relaxation Skills
Talk to Yourself with Love, Hope, and Caring
Give to Others
Seek Individual Counseling
Consider Medication
Family and Friends
Regulate and Control the Possible
Be Wary of Statistics
Find Meaning
When cancer is diagnosed, the denial that life goes on forever is replaced with the knowledge that life is finite. Normal responses include fear, anxiety, sadness, and a sense of loss, which may become more intense, depending on the diagnosis and prognosis. A treatment plan for mantle cell lymphoma must include strategies to respond to the inevitable psychological distress. Interventions should assist in the day-to-day living with the disease, and hopefully lead to psychological growth and healing. No one chooses cancer, but many patients and family members take away deeper understandings and meaning about life. Here are 13 ideas to help live with the diagnosis:
Join a support group. Groups provide the opportunity to share your story with others and allow for the possibility of giving and receiving support and deeper connections with others. It is important to talk about positive and negative feelings with others who understand. Emotions become more manageable when they are understood and shared.
Write, write, write. Research indicates that writing about trauma helps. Start a journal and write about the experiences, feelings, reactions.
Health
Look for hope. One can feel hopefulness about many things: participating in a family event, having a good day, the sun shining, love from others. Find activities and experiences where hope is nourished.
Spirituality and faith. Seek comfort in spiritual and faith practices. Sometimes this may mean exploring new communities or revisiting old ones.
Learn relaxation skills. Deep breathing, guided imagery, and meditation are all means to induce the relaxation response, which have known benefits for quality of life, well-being, and immune function.
Talk to yourself with love, hope and caring. How you talk to yourself can alter how you feel. Examine your internal dialogue. Look for ways to make this encouraging and empowering.
Give to others. One of the best antidotes to sadness is the joy that comes in giving to others. Many patients lose this when they are ill. Look for ways to give in words or deeds.
Seek individual counseling. Individual therapy can be especially helpful during this time. Find someone who understands cancer and talk about your ongoing concerns.
Consider medication. Some patients benefit from medication to help stabilize mood and help generate a better sense of well-being. Consider a referral to a psychiatrist, especially if you have a history of depression.
Family and friends. Connection to those you love brings meaning to life. It also provides the opportunity to distract oneself by engaging in fun activities. Call upon family and friends for emotional support and a dose of laughter and joy.
Regulate and control the possible. Eating well, sleeping regularly, utilizing stress reducing techniques, seeking educated opinions, following treatment regimens, and nurturing yourself are within your control. Be aware of what is realistically in your control and focus energy on these rather than events not in your control.
Be wary of statistics. Statistics about your disease define groups of people. They do not define what happens to you as an individual. Keep this fact in mind.
Find meaning. Insights and understandings about life often come from painful experiences. Utilize these experiences as an opportunity to explore who you are, your strengths and what you have learned about life. Let others learn from your experiences by sharing them.
Anne Coscarelli, PhD, is a psychologist and researcher who has examined quality of life in oncology for more than 20 years.
