![[CNBC] The most ‘infuriating’ bosses share these 3 common traits, says Ivy League psychologist](https://media.nbcnewyork.com/2025/02/107130969-1665147331267-gettyimages-1400541949-gx1a0316.jpeg?quality=85&strip=all&resize=320%2C180)
Some bosses can make you excited about doing your best work. Others can make the workplace an absolute nightmare.
Those bad bosses tend to share three common traits, according to Adam Galinsky, a social psychologist and leadership professor at Columbia Business School: They're selfish, cowardly or lacking in big-picture vision, he said on a recent episode of "The Anxious Achiever" podcast.
Galinsky, who has studied leadership for more than 20 years, wrote a book called "Inspire: The Universal Path for Leading Yourself and Others" that published last month. "One of the core themes of my research ... is that inspiring people and infuriating people exist on this sort of enduring continuum," he said.
Infuriating bosses aren't that hard to find, studies show. Seventy-one percent of workers say they've had a toxic boss at some point, according to an October 2023 survey of more than 1,200 Americans from The Harris Poll and global marketing firm Stagwell. Thirty-one percent said they're currently working with one, saying the most prevalent behaviors are bosses who "set unreasonable expectations" and don't "give credit to team members when appropriate."
Get Tri-state area news delivered to your inbox. Sign up for NBC New York's News Headlines newsletter.
DON'T MISS: How to use AI to be more productive and successful at work
But difficult managers aren't destined to remain that way forever, Galinsky said.
"We are not born as inspiring or infuriating people. It's our current behavior that inspires and infuriates," said Galinsky. "Now, that is [an] incredibly hopeful and optimistic message, because that means that if we can change our behavior, right? We can move from the infuriating end of the continuum to the inspiring end of the continuum."
Money Report
Changing these behaviors starts with gaining some self-awareness: Take a moment to think about the emotions and character traits you showcase the most, Galinsky said. Maybe you're often stressed about your heavy workload, leading you to be curt and too hyper-focused at work. Jot down how these feelings impact your performance in life and at work.
You could also try asking the people around you — colleagues, advisors, direct reports — for feedback, neuroscientist Juliette Han told CNBC Make It in 2023. Ask about a time you made the workplace feel uninviting, or about a scenario they wished you'd handled differently.
Their answers will "help you glean something about yourself, the impact you have on those you work with and how others view you," Han said.
You may learn that your anxiety around missing deadlines causes you to be an overbearing boss, constantly asking for updates or breathing down your employees' necks. Or that your ego makes it hard for you to admit wrongdoing. By gaining that self-awareness, you can then flip those behaviors, maybe deciding to hold bi-weekly team meetings to gauge progress or consciously focusing on collaboration instead of being a know-it-all.
When you can "harness" your negative behaviors, you can "be more courageous" about how you deal with them and turn them into constructive ones, Galinsky said.
That can "really determine whether we're more inspiring or infuriating," he added.
Want to up your AI skills and be more productive? Take CNBC's new online course How to Use AI to Be More Successful at Work. Expert instructors will teach you how to get started, practical uses, tips for effective prompt-writing, and mistakes to avoid. Sign up now and use coupon code EARLYBIRD for an introductory discount of 30% off $67 (+ taxes and fees) through February 11, 2025.
Plus, sign up for CNBC Make It's newsletter to get tips and tricks for success at work, with money and in life.