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Jets Tightness Goes Beyond Revis Island

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    NEWSLETTERS

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    In a perfect world, Thursday's revelation of a tight hamstring for Darrelle Revis would be nothing more than a grand attempt at gamesmanship aimed at the Patriots.

    It goes a little something like this: The Jets announce that Revis has a tight hamstring and have him say that it is possibly a result of missing training camp. That revelation spreads like wildfire as the masses, already enjoying the chance to rip the Jets after Monday night, start readying their steely knives to eviscerate the team and player for destroying the season over a few million dollars. The news naturally makes its way to Boston where Tom Brady flips his Bieber-tastic hair from his eyes and looks over at Randy Moss and sees this as his chance to make his increasingly disgruntled receiver happy by throwing the ball to him early and often.

    Fast forward to Sunday. The Patriots try to put their plan into motion and Revis intercepts Brady's first pass for a touchdown. The scene repeats itself later in the first half as Brady struggles to comprehend that he's been had, leading to great celebration across the city and a much needed victory for the Jets. After the game, Bill Belichick forces Brady to get a haircut and Moss simply disappears into the night as the Patriots, ashamed by their gullibility, devolve into a 4-12 season. 

    Alas, we do not live in a perfect world and the news that Revis has a tight hamstring is probably just an accurate representation of the state of affairs inside the cornerback's leg. And that means that there's one more thing for Jets fans to spend the next two days worrying about in addition to Mark Sanchez's impersonation of a POW, Brian Schottenheimer's convoluted gameplans, the fact that they have the same level of self control around attractive women as a group of 2-year-olds around bubbles, Kris Jenkins's fragile knees and the general state of impending doom that comes with choosing to root for Gang Green. 

    Throw in fasting for Yom Kippur and you've got yourself the makings for one fun-filled weekend!

    We're going to spare you the detailed preview of what Sunday's game is going to look like because you know exactly what it is going to look like. Two games a year against the Patriots means that you know them as well as you know the Jets. You know that all the talk of the Moss-Revis matchup matters not if the Jets haven't figured out how to stop Wes Welker and you know that the Patriots' problematic defense will be just fine if Sanchez and Schottenheimer haven't figured things out.

    And it's a sure thing that if the Jets lose again on Sunday that you'll see apocolyptic headlines of the type that the Mayans predicted we wouldn't see until 2012.

    Josh Alper is a writer living in New York City and is a contributor to FanHouse.com and ProFootballTalk.com in addition to his duties for NBCNewYork.com. You can follow him on Twitter.

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