10 Reasons Not To Have Kids Yet... Or Ever

By JESSICA WAKEMAN

Updated 2:30 PM EST, Fri, Jun 12, 2009

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Cameron Diaz thinks your kids are bad for the environment.

Well, no, not really. But she told Cosmopolitan she thinks women shouldn’t be pressured into procreating or “shunned” for not having kids because “honestly, we don’t need any more kids. We have plenty of people on this planet already.” While we agree with Cameron that it’s b.s. women still get hassled for not raising rugrats, we can think of far better reasons than old Mother Nature for staying childless. Our reasons…

If you were up last night at 3 a.m., it’s your own damn fault.
Nothing in your closet has someone else’s barf on it. Or someone else’s poop.
You don’t want to keep a spare, clean diaper or a baggie of Cheerios in your purse.
You still want to wear a push-up bra—not a nursing bra.
You can’t have that second mojito if you’re breast feeding.
It’s probably a health hazard to carry around a 10lb baby in four-inch heels.
You want to spend all morning in bed having sex...and all afternoon, too.
You are the only one you want your guy calling a “baby.”
You can blast Amy Winehouse or Lil’ Kim as loud as you want as you want, whenever you want.
If something strange is leaking out of your vagina, it’s probably just because of your period.