Welcome to Watch List, where we identify five things on TV to watch while you stay at home and stare as Charlie Sheen drinks a gallon of gasoline without ANY physical repercussions. The man is a cyborg. LET’S GO!
MEGA PYTHON VS. GATOROID – 9:00PM Saturday (SyFy – an NBC/Universal Network) This is the big one, people. SyFy’s latest Saturday night schlockfest features Tiffany and Debbie Gibson staging an extended catfight, all while huge pythons battle mutant alligators in the Florida swamplands. Like anyone could possibly resist that. This should be its own Playstation 3 game. I think SyFy is only going to get cheaper and trashier from this point on. This is Ground Zero of their B-movement. It’s like when that Danish guy invented Dogma 95, only the precise opposite. Will you see the likes of Lindsay Lohan and Ice-T’s wife in future movies on this network? Yes, you will. ANTICIPATION: SKY HIGH!
MANCAVES – 8:30PM Tonight (DIY!) A man has a fully operational football scoreboard installed in his basement. Man 1, Good Taste 0. I really wish they just called man caves “TV rooms” the way they used to. “Man cave” sounds like a bad diagnosis from your proctologist. ANTICIPATION: LAZY!
WORKING CLASS – 8:00PM Tonight (CMT) CMT makes their first foray into scripted comedy with this traditional sitcom about a blue collar mom moving her family into an upper class Midwestern neighborhood. Silly TV. There ARE no upper class Midwestern neighborhoods anymore. Anyway, expect plenty of jokes about how them there rich folk don’t live like us normal folk do. Also in the fold is Ed Asner, so expect a healthy dose of charming crabbiness. Ed’s getting up there now. It looks like he’s carved out of oak. ANTICIPATION: COUNTRY!
THE LOST VALENTINE – 9:00PM Sunday (CBS) Jennifer Love Hewitt plays a dogged TV reporter (is there any other kind in TV movies?) whose life is changed forever when she meets a WWII widow played by Betty White. And then, GATORS attack! Okay, they don’t attack. But honestly, this weepie could use a little more Gatoroid in it. ANTICIPATION: BETTY!
KENNEDYS HOME MOVIES – 9:00PM Sunday (History Channel) “Look they-ah, Bawbby. Seems Ted went and threw up in the hawt tub again. It uh, er uh, is your-ah turn to clean it up.” ANTICIPATION: DRINKING!